{"id":350,"date":"2014-07-02T22:11:27","date_gmt":"2014-07-03T06:11:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/biz141.inmotionhosting.com\/~akweko6\/sacollins.com\/wp\/?p=350"},"modified":"2014-07-03T04:37:27","modified_gmt":"2014-07-03T12:37:27","slug":"the-half-boyfriend-weve-all-been-there","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?p=350","title":{"rendered":"The Half-Boyfriend… we’ve all been there…"},"content":{"rendered":"

31 Days of Brannan…\u00a0Day 2<\/em><\/h1>\n

 <\/p>\n

Today’s Playlist: \u00a0Half-Boyfriend<\/em><\/h2>\n

 <\/p>\n

[embedplusvideo height=”329″ width=”400″ editlink=”http:\/\/bit.ly\/1obgakr” standard=”http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/_7CDT820D7c?fs=1&vq=hd720″ vars=”ytid=_7CDT820D7c&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=&notes=&lean=1″ id=”ep1613″ \/]<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

So here’s the song that crystallized it for me. It made me a bonafide Brannan-ite (?), Jay-Fan (??), I’m gonna need help with that one. There’s gotta be a marketing moniker for Jay’s fans out there – The Jay Babes? I’ll keep thinking on it.<\/p>\n

Anywho- Half-Boyfriend.<\/p>\n

Yeah, man or woman, we’ve all been there. The guy you can’t possibly believe you’ve hooked up with but he’s hella hot in his own bad boy way, treats you like a second class citizen at times, but damned if he isn’t either great in the sack or will bust your balls with some romantic (and completely unforeseen) gesture that just makes you have one of those ‘well fuck me running’ moments. So you give in yet again, even if your brain keeps screaming behind that thick pane of glass that separates your head from your heart telling you to give him the boot but you just can’t cause he’s one hell of a number and the other guys and gals are all thinking how you so scored with that one.<\/p>\n

Am I right?<\/p>\n

Now, I can’t say with any certainty that that is what Jay experienced (I mean, I don’t know the man, personally) but the song had enough common truth in it that that’s what I took away from it.<\/p>\n

For me his name was Ron. And lord did he fuck up my life for a while. He was the son of a friend that my mom knew back when she was a kid in her old neighborhood. Small world right? I mean the guy’s family moved away when my mom was still young. But somehow fate had a hand in it and Ron turned out to be gay and so did I – what were the chances of that? Say nothing of his finding his way to me?<\/p>\n

Stupidly, I took it as a sign. The universe was saying we should be together… (yeah, not so much).<\/p>\n

We did a lot of shit that was technically illegal (how we got away with it I’ll never know). I was in my late teens (just outta high school) and just yearning for some man on man love. Ron was energetic, he was built, he was – okay, he was a little quirky when it came to the bedroom (at least at that stage in my life). Ron was far more sexually adventurous than I was at that stage but I went along for the ride (save the dumb-ass remarks ’cause you ain’t thinkin’ anything I haven’t thought or said to myself). So I got into shit I probably shoulda saved until I was a bit more mature. But it didn’t go that way. I wanted the bad boy adventure he promised – it was wild, it was certainly dangerous, and it was flat out stupid.<\/p>\n

Ron and I were really rarely on the same page – probably why Jay’s lines from Half-Boyfriend hit me over the emotive head rather hard:<\/p>\n

I could give a million reasons<\/span><\/strong><\/em>
Why we should not be friends<\/span><\/strong><\/em>
Our moods change like the seasons<\/span><\/strong><\/em>
My mood ends your mood begins and<\/span><\/strong><\/em>

You\u2019re a tease, you\u2019re a cockblocker<\/span><\/strong><\/em>
You\u2019re a loud mouth bitch, and a big talker,<\/span><\/strong><\/em>
But that\u2019s okay.<\/span><\/strong><\/em>
You\u2019ll grow up someday.<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

They are certainly what I latched onto and took away as ‘preach it, brotha…’ because in those few lines he took me right back to those heady and wild and completely stupid days of young love.<\/p>\n

Oh, and a sidebar here<\/strong><\/span> – I should come clean about my fangirl stalker write up of the day before. I tend to write with tongue firmly planted in cheek. So while I have nothing but complete admiration and am often awestruck by Brannan’s prose, I am hardly the wild and nut-ball cray-cray I prattled on about in yesterday’s post. I was just having a bit of fun. I can be off that way sometimes. Partially why I get it when Jay riffs esoterically on his YouTube channel. When I am in the doldrums and can’t figure out how to get the creative juices flowing I just listen to a few of his mental musings and it’s like splashing cool water all over my tired brain. If brains could gain any benefits from such an exercise. But, well, hopefully you get my meanin’…<\/p>\n

So back to Ron the bad-boy Half-Boyfriend in my life:<\/p>\n

So I finally got smart, or should I say my friends and family got smarter than me at that point and made me see the light. This after a bad drug induced moment where Ron went completely off the rails and I had to, with the assistance of his parents who were then living in Seattle (we were in San Diego) have him committed to County Mental Health so he could recuperate and get some much needed help. Turns out there were a whole lot of issues I didn’t want to even look at then that came out in the wash from that little drug induced scene.<\/p>\n

Looking back on it now, I just shake my head and thank the universe that I smartened up. In a way, I kind of thank Ron for being the whack job that he was. I got my bad boy phase through early on in life. Which led me to the man who I would spend the next ten years of my life with (and no, that’s not the hubby of 20 years that I am married to now). But more on boyfriend number 2 when we get to the post about the song that reminds me of him. I’ll let you all know when that is.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Now for a completely esoteric moment from Jay – I love it when he just does something fearless… never fails to make me smile.<\/span><\/h3>\n

 <\/p>\n

[embedplusvideo height=”329″ width=”400″ editlink=”http:\/\/bit.ly\/1obkCj6″ standard=”http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/dtyJog6lQYk?fs=1&vq=hd720″ vars=”ytid=dtyJog6lQYk&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=&notes=&lean=1″ id=”ep6526″ \/]<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JAY’S TOUR DATES – Please check them out and catch his show in your area…<\/h1>\n

Tour Dates<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

31 Days of Brannan…\u00a0Day 2   Today’s Playlist: \u00a0Half-Boyfriend   [embedplusvideo height=”329″ width=”400″ editlink=”http:\/\/bit.ly\/1obgakr” standard=”http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/_7CDT820D7c?fs=1&vq=hd720″ vars=”ytid=_7CDT820D7c&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=&notes=&lean=1″ id=”ep1613″ \/]   So here’s the song that crystallized it for me. It made me a bonafide Brannan-ite (?), Jay-Fan (??), I’m gonna need help with that one. There’s gotta be a marketing moniker for Jay’s fans out there […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[43,5,7,22,18],"tags":[135,137,134,27,136,16],"class_list":["post-350","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life-inserts-itself","category-mm-lovefest","category-my-what-the-fuck-on-the-media","category-music-that-inspires","category-writing","tag-bad-boys","tag-gay-life","tag-half-boyfriend","tag-jay-brannan","tag-music-imitates-art","tag-relationships"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p75tPU-5E","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":584,"url":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?p=584","url_meta":{"origin":350,"position":0},"title":"We can all use a little expert advice…","author":"S A Collins","date":"July 24, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"31 Days of Brannan - Day 24 \u00a0 [embedplusvideo height=\"329\" width=\"400\" editlink=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/1mLCvT6\" standard=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/elq1vCh1cno?fs=1&vq=hd720\" vars=\"ytid=elq1vCh1cno&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=¬es=\" id=\"ep9189\" \/] \u00a0 Today's Playlist -\u00a0 Relax your neck (and breathe through your nose) \u00a0 I've always wanted to play this video. I am a big Margaret Cho fan. So the idea of Brannan and Cho\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Giving Back"","block_context":{"text":"Giving Back","link":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?cat=48"},"img":{"alt_text":"Jay's Website - jaybrannan.com","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/biz141.inmotionhosting.com\/~akweko6\/sacollins.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/JBbanner-300x249.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":590,"url":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?p=590","url_meta":{"origin":350,"position":1},"title":"80 Days of Jay","author":"S A Collins","date":"July 26, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"31 Days of Brannan - Day 26 \u00a0 [embedplusvideo height=\"329\" width=\"400\" editlink=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/1nJqq5B\" standard=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/0KeeczV_1Q4?fs=1&vq=hd720\" vars=\"ytid=0KeeczV_1Q4&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=¬es=\" id=\"ep4101\" \/] \u00a0 Today's Playlist - Twee Vaders \u00a0- \u00a0in Dutch, no less... \u00a0 I like that Jay takes the time to find a way to connect with his international audiences. He may flub things up\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Giving Back"","block_context":{"text":"Giving Back","link":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?cat=48"},"img":{"alt_text":"Jay's Website - jaybrannan.com","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/biz141.inmotionhosting.com\/~akweko6\/sacollins.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/JBbanner-300x249.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":578,"url":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?p=578","url_meta":{"origin":350,"position":2},"title":"Journey to the Dead Sea","author":"S A Collins","date":"July 23, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"31 Days of Brannan - Day 23 \u00a0 [embedplusvideo height=\"329\" width=\"400\" editlink=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/1niR7P4\" standard=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/IpcIIaiyWlM?fs=1&vq=hd720\" vars=\"ytid=IpcIIaiyWlM&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=¬es=\" id=\"ep1767\" \/] Today's Playlist - The Eldan Song \u00a0 So after the dark and wanderlust thoughts I had in my last posting with Jay's (and my) past, separate as they may be, I wanted something a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Journey"","block_context":{"text":"Journey","link":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?cat=216"},"img":{"alt_text":"Jay's Website - jaybrannan.com","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/biz141.inmotionhosting.com\/~akweko6\/sacollins.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/JBbanner-300x249.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":599,"url":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?p=599","url_meta":{"origin":350,"position":3},"title":"LIVE FROM…","author":"S A Collins","date":"July 28, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"31 Days of Brannan - Day 28 \u00a0 Today's Playlist - ANYTHING LIVE! (We're only a few days away from his performance in SAN FRANCISCO!)\u00a0 \u00a0 Up first - B\u00e4 B\u00e4 Vita Lamm \u00a0(Live from Stockholm, Sweden) \u00a0 [embedplusvideo height=\"329\" width=\"400\" editlink=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/UyEK5C\" standard=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/cHBlrLqklow?fs=1&vq=hd720\" vars=\"ytid=cHBlrLqklow&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=¬es=\" id=\"ep6797\" \/] \u00a0 This is brilliant\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Giving Back"","block_context":{"text":"Giving Back","link":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?cat=48"},"img":{"alt_text":"Jay's Website - jaybrannan.com","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/biz141.inmotionhosting.com\/~akweko6\/sacollins.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/JBbanner-300x249.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":595,"url":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?p=595","url_meta":{"origin":350,"position":4},"title":"Using Both Hands","author":"S A Collins","date":"July 27, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"31 Days of Brannan - Day 27 \u00a0 [embedplusvideo height=\"329\" width=\"400\" editlink=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/1k38iEv\" standard=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/F2b6YDmR-Bg?fs=1&vq=hd720\" vars=\"ytid=F2b6YDmR-Bg&width=400&height=329&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=1&autoplay=0&react=0&chapters=¬es=\" id=\"ep3080\" \/] \u00a0 Today's Playlist - \u00a0Both Hands (Ani DiFranco Cover) \u00a0 This is a song that Jay has recorded (quite brilliantly, I might add) on his 80 Days of Jay album. This is a rather\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "imitation as Flattery"","block_context":{"text":"imitation as Flattery","link":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?cat=229"},"img":{"alt_text":"Jay's Website - jaybrannan.com","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/biz141.inmotionhosting.com\/~akweko6\/sacollins.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/JBbanner-300x249.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":587,"url":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?p=587","url_meta":{"origin":350,"position":5},"title":"Introducing (well better late than never) Celine Jayon!","author":"S A Collins","date":"July 26, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"31 Days of Brannan - Day 25 \u00a0 Author's Note: I lost my internet as I was writing this one up last night and didn't get it back until the middle of the following day (like, today) when the damned cable guy showed up to fix it! Don'tcha just LOVE\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "imitation as Flattery"","block_context":{"text":"imitation as Flattery","link":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/?cat=229"},"img":{"alt_text":"Jay's Website - jaybrannan.com","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/biz141.inmotionhosting.com\/~akweko6\/sacollins.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/JBbanner-300x249.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/350","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=350"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/350\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":359,"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/350\/revisions\/359"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=350"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=350"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sacollins.com\/blog-wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=350"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}